Puppy Love

All teen shows feature crushes, unrequited love and romantic treachery, of course, but none hit it so spot-on as "Dawson's Creek," which was to Carolina teenagers what working at Seattle Grace is for physicians: a romantic free-for-all.

Prerequisite: "The Wonder Years," where young love was shown in all its glorious and tragic hyperbole

Advanced Placement: "Gilmore Girls," "Felicity," "One Tree Hill"

Class Clowns

Face it, if you couldn't laugh at the absurdities of high school,
you'd never survive. The king of the class clowns: "Welcome Back,
Kotter," which, while being "relevant" to '70s issues such as race, socioeconomic class and school busing, managed to gather an ensemble cast that showcased the show's truly great sitcom writing -- not to mention launching the career of John Travolta. Up your nose with a rubber hose!

Prerequisite: "Happy Days"

Advanced Placement: "Fresh Prince of Bel-Air," "Malcolm in the Middle," "Punk'd"

My So-Called Angst

Wasn't there a line on "The Simpsons" about "making teenagers depressed is like shooting fish in a barrel"? Yeah, but that's what we like about them -- and that's what we remember about high school: the whole disaffected alienation bummer-ness of it all. The reigning champ: "My So-Called Life," which leavened the experience with wry humor and touching grace.

Prerequisite: "The Mod Squad"

Advanced placement: "Buffy the Vampire Slayer," "Smallville."

Free Period

What would high school be without its own soundtrack? Over the years, the appeal of music shows aimed at teens has never waned, though it's mutated sometimes beyond recognition. The headliner: "The Ed Sullivan Show," which, despite its roots in old-fogeydom, recognized the value of showcasing music for "the youngsters," including Elvis, the Beatles, the Stones and the Doors. The times they were a-changin'.

Prerequisite: "Solid Gold."

Advanced placement: Early MTV, "Total Request Live," "Headbanger's Ball," "American Idol"

Biology Class

Teens under a microscope: Peculiar to the '60s and early '70s, these shows tried to get a handle on what these kids were all about. Once the Youthquake took over pop culture, the shows died a natural death, but not before the debut of the fresh-faced prom queen: "The Patty Duke Show" ("a hot dog makes her lose control" -- not a lyric that would have made it into the free-love '70s).

Advanced placement: "Gidget," "Room 222"

Bullies

Someday someone will write a treatise on why the late '80s and early '90s were such a breeding ground for bad teen comedies, but for now, we will only single them out.

Failed: "Head of the Class," from which there are no memorable quotes, no great characters, no nothing. Detention for you!

Advanced placement: "Growing Pains," "Saved by the Bell," "Full House," "Charles in Charge," "Blossom"

Extra-extra credit: For all you teens needing your self-esteem punctured: "Next." Ouch!