The Best & Worst Sci-fi on Television - by Sean Axmaker
The Worst
Lost in Space "Lost in Space" (1965-68)
Irwin Allen's original "Space Family Robinson" sci-fantasy takes the viewer back to the exciting space-age days of 1997, when the first deep-space mission lifted off with the American nuclear family in a deep freeze. There's no science in this goofy fiction, and the dimwitted stories are among the silliest of Allen's many effects-driven adventures series. The highlight is the camp theatrics of prissy Jonathan Harris (as a Cold War spy) locked in a battle of wits with adolescent Bill Mumy, while the Robby-like robot swings his slinky arms and drones "Danger, Will Robinson!" Stupid, but harmless. But mostly stupid.
Space: 1999 "Space: 1999" (1975-77)
The premise is absurd, even as sci-fi TV goes: An explosion on
a nuclear-waste dump on the dark side of the moon sends it
out of Earth's orbit and shooting about the galaxy like a rogue
asteroid. Taken along for the ride are a moonbase full of
scientists (among them Martin Landau, Barry Morse and
Barbara Bain). Luckily, they swoop past another promising
planet in time for a futile exploration for a new home on almost every episode. It can be a visually impressive show (producers Gerry and Sylvia Anderson know their special effects), but the bland characters and dizzyingly incomprehensible adventures become simply stupefying.
Battlestar Galactica "Battlestar Galactica" (1978-79)
This shameless "Star Wars" knock-off, co-produced by special-effects godfather John Dykstra, charts the flight of the last survivors of the human race on their journey to find the Eden of legend called Earth, under the paternal guidance of their wise old Admiral (Lorne Greene). Meanwhile, the unspeakably evil and unbelievably short-sighted traitor Baltar leads the robot chrome-dome Cylon army to finish their mission of genocide. Myth and legend are recklessly slathered through the series (dig those crazy Egyptian-themed space helmets), but the series devolved into an almost comic predictability as Baltar, the Wile E. Coyote of interstellar villains, fails, survives to attack another day, and repeats until cancelled. After a single season.
Buck Rogers in the 25th Century "Buck Rogers in the 25th Century" (1979-81)
Gil Gerard dons the Spandex jumpsuit to play the American astronaut who blasts off from Earth in 1987 and returns 500 years later to the war-ravaged world of the 25th century, where he's just the kind of two-fisted, red-blooded American they need. Teamed up with Col. Wilma Deering (Erin Gray) and little robot buddy Twiki (voiced by Mel Blanc), he plays space cowboy on the galactic frontier, where the evil Draconian Empire spins its plots of galactic domination. At once corny and kitschy, it drops campy humor in a vision of the future that hasn't progressed much from the 1930s serials. In the words of Twiki, "Bidibidibidi -- this stinks, Buck!"
Sean Axmaker is a film critic for the Seattle Post-Intelligencer and a DVD columnist for IMdB. He is a regular contributor to Amazing Stories, Asian Cult Cinema, Greencine.com and StaticMultimedia.com. His reviews and essays are featured in the recently released "Scarecrow Movie Guide."
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