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Things Parents Do to Avoid 'Dora' and Other Kids Shows
What annoys moms and dads about some children's channels

By Martha Brockenbrough
Special to MSN TV

We can't all be "bronies," grown men so secure with their masculinity and so in touch with their inner child* that they revel in episodes of the animated "My Little Pony" show.

No, some of us are time-worn adults, and the thought of certain children's programming fills us with dread so thick you could cut it into slices, use it to fashion magical pony shoes and gallop far, far beyond the most distant rainbow.

Bing: Most popular kids shows

What drives parents nuts about the kiddie channels? Let us count the things: Caillou's voice. The nasal nattering of SpongeBob SquarePants. The incessant sass on many a tween show. The relentless advertising for junk food and unnecessary toys.

If it weren't for the sad fact that many of us have owed our daily showers to the boob tube, many parents would no doubt unplug the thing once and for all.

But good luck with that. Avoiding television is hard, even if you don't have one. Amy Baskin lives the TV-free lifestyle in Portland, Ore. But people keep trying to give them to her, telling her, "It's for the children."

And, as weird as it is to try to give other people's children television, there is a certain logic to it.

We all knew the kid who grew up deprived of junk food at home and who'd binge on it at every opportunity. Children's pop culture is like a vaccination. A little bit can keep them from developing an incurable case of Hannah Montanitis.

Nonetheless, many parents are resorting to subterfuge to keep their least favorite shows out of the family room.

One Seattle mom told her son that "Caillou" had been canceled, for example.

 "The little kid on it whines throughout the entire show," Erin Miller says. "It's like nails on a chalkboard." Her son believed her -- until he started to read. He turned it on for his little sister and proudly announced, "They brought it back."

Lane Morris Buckman, meanwhile, feels the same way about Diego and Dora. "It is irrational how much I dislike these shouty, imaginary children," she says. "I want to go find their imaginary parents and kick them. I have bribed my child with treats to get him to turn them off before, then I just got wise to the rotation schedule and made sure he was nowhere near a television at their airing."

It's no wonder irritating voices are at the top of the list when it comes to things parents despise about certain kids shows.  We don't like whininess, baby talk and the indoor use of outdoor voices when our kids do it. Why would we like it when cartoon children do the same?

Next on the list of things parents despise about children's TV programming is the incessant sass. It's a tween-show staple: Character kids speak sarcastically to each other and even with their parents and teachers. It can be funny on TV, but in real life, it's anything but.

And then there's the advertising. Junk food, sugary cereals, trendy toys, movies, other TV shows ...

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